Beth Xanthopoulos on Womanhood
Happy International Women’s Day and Women’s History Month! My womanhood means the world to me, and I couldn’t imagine writing about anything else this month. So! This week’s article has quite the twist to it! Below, I’ve answered some questions about my womanhood, and I’m asking you to do the same! Here is the link to a Google form in which you can answer these questions yourself. You will have until March 26th at 11:30 PM to do so. The form will also be accessible via @bits.and.beths on Instagram and my Linktree below this article. Please know that if you fill out the form, there is a high chance your writing will be featured on Bits & Beths in March 30th’s article.
Let the celebration of womanhood begin!
When do you feel like you became a woman?
It’s hard for me to pinpoint the exact moment I became a woman; I don’t think there is one. I think I became a woman over the course of my last three years of college. Those years taught me more about womanhood, female friendship, and my connection to my femininity than ever before. In these years, I faced many adversities, and I took them head on the way I have seen so many women do before me, with confidence and poise, something I had struggled to do in the past. I danced in the rain, I did my friend’s eyeliner, I drove down Lake Shore Drive screaming Linger at the top of my lungs, I took accountability, I learned how to paint my own nails, I got straight As, I found my voice and used it often, I consoled crying sisters, I grew into the woman I am today in every way in those last three years.
What advice would you give a girl coming into her womanhood?
Genuinely, honestly, stop comparing yourself to other women. You will never be her, and there is absolutely nothing you can do about that because you were never meant to be her; you were always meant to be you. Having admiration for another woman is one thing (I prescribe you my article The Art of Admiration under the segment ‘Noted!’). However, as literally everyone has always said, comparison is the thief of joy. When I stopped comparing myself to others and started authentically living as Beth Xanthopoulos, my life completely changed. Not only did I like myself more, but others liked me more, too. Win-win!
When do you feel most in touch with your femininity?
Without a doubt, when I am with my friends. Whether we are running errands, spending hours sunbathing by the lake, getting ready to go out, or even just sitting talking our mouths off in someone's living room, being with them makes me feel like I’m back in first grade playing with my American Girl dolls in my purple carpeted bedroom. My female friends understand me in a way I never knew anyone could (I can’t see the keyboard through my tears right now). I see it when I’m with my best friend I talk to every day just the same as when I get to reconnect with a high school friend I haven’t seen in person in years; she gets me, she really gets me.
What is your favorite story with your girlfriends?
My favorite story with my girlfriends is actually an entire weekend's worth of events. From going out Thursday for my little’s birthday, to getting my hair done with two of my best friends on Friday, to winning my boyfriend’s fraternity’s philanthropy week on saturday & celebrating (hard) at our favorite bar, to celebrating one of my best friends birthday in the Wrigley bleachers on Sunday, needless to say, we had ourselves an absolute weekend. It was giving very much so “No sleep! Bus, club, another club, another club, plane, next place, no sleep, no fear, nobody believed in me.”
What is the best piece of advice you’ve been given by another woman?
I’m not sure if this is really a piece of advice or rather just a sentiment to remind yourself of, but I once saw a woman on TikTok say “bugs flock to light,” and it lives rent-free in my head. More than a few times in the last few months, girls have vented to me about how they feel like they keep attracting terrible people into their lives, and every time I’ve told them that bugs flock to light, it has resonated deeply. Now, I don’t want you to go nuts and use this as an excuse for every bad thing that happens in your life. C’mon girls, some self-reflection is needed too. Babe why do you keep letting shitty people into your life? Anyways…
What is your biggest accomplishment?
Honestly, I think my biggest accomplishment is starting Bits & Beths. Before college I really gave a damn about what other people thought of me. I absolutely never would have felt confident enough to put so much of myself on the internet. Bits & Beths is more than a blog to me, it’s tangible proof that I have grown and changed and that I feel confident in the woman I have grown and changed into. It’s not about how many clicks I get, it’s about putting myself out there and pushing myself to be confident in my writing despite what anyone else might think of it. It took me a long time to get here, but I got here nonetheless.
Who is a woman you admire?
It is truly hard to pinpoint just one woman I admire, I admire so many that I wrote an entire article about it. Today, and every other day, I admire my best friend, Jessica. There is literally no other human being on the planet who cares about people as much as Jessica cares about people. No matter who you are, from me (her best friend) to a stranger passing her on the street, she will treat you the same way she treats everyone else, with an entire bundle of empathy, compassion, and care. She has taught me more about caring for my mental health and others than anyone else. I know for a fact I would not be half the woman I am today without her by my side for the last almost 10 years.
How would you describe the women in your life? How would they describe you?
To put it simply, the women in my life are unmatched. I don’t know if there is another person out there who is surrounded by as awesome of women as I am; I genuinely don’t know if it is possible. The women in my life care deeply, laugh often, work hard, and dream big. They are funny and smart just as much as they are beautiful and supportive. I can’t imagine my life without them. I think (and hope) these women would describe me as funny and sarcastic and as someone they know they can always rely on to be there when they need me. I also think they would describe me as Charlotte York- if we’re talking in Sex and the City terms.
What are your hopes for the next generation of women?
I hope the next generation of women have their reproductive freedoms. I hope they lift each other up instead of feeling like they have to climb each other to get to the top. I hope they dream massively and support each other's dreams, too. I hope they belly laugh often and giggle even more. I hope they feel safe. I hope they feel confident in the women they become. I have a lot of hopes for them, but most of all, I hope they’re even better than us.
It’s always a great day to be a lady, but especially today! I feel so lucky to be in community with such amazing women; I can’t wait to read what you all have to share about your journey to womanhood.
Once again, here is the link to the Google form B&B Women’s History Month Form
Write you soon!
Beth <3
